Beyond the hills-Chapter 5

Prologue: topic37432.html

Chapter I: topic37490.html

Chapter II: topic37965.html

Chapter III: topic38391.html

Chapter IV: topic38444.html

CHAPTER V

"Rachel, what's wrong?" Elvy asked.

'Stanio...death...evil....death...Esmassma....' The wind whispered.

"Stanio..." Rachel repeated what it said.

'fire...slaves...Esmassma....death.... Kumakatok'

"Stanio! It's been burnt!" Rachel called out, finally making sense of what the wind was telling her.

"What?" Elvy asked, "You can't know that....how could you know?"

"The wind," Rachel replied. "It's...alive,"

"How can the wind be alive, and how can you know that Stanio has been burnt?" Elvy asked, still confused.

"The wind told me!"

"Ummm....I think we should take you to Doctor Gulio." Elvy said carefully.

"I'm not going mad! I heard it! Listen now," Rachel said. For several moments they were quite. The wind didn't speak.

"The wind spoke?" Elvy asked, starting walking again.

* * *

"My admirable lord," BaCelik started off. "Sssssssire, the Kumakatokhae arrived."

"Good," The voice from the corner said. "Bring them here."

"My lord, they want you to go to them yourself, my liege," BaCelik said.

"Tell them I shall not move from my throne."

"Is thagt trgue?" A solid shadow stepped out. It looked like a cloud, parts of it almost blowing away.

"Yes," The voice spoke.

"Then we shagll not deal wigg you any longa," The shadow said, turning.

"You will not deal with me?" The ancient voice asked. "Then I shall come." Then, out of the shadows, the vioce's master stepped. He had a fleshless body, strips of forgotten skin hanging from his ribs and head. Between his bones pieces of flesh were wedged, like food would stick to teeth. Where eyes were supposed to be, were black holes, darkness spilling out of them.

"Lead me to them."

* * *

"Run!" Rachel heard the wind howl.

"Wind can't speak." Rachel muttered to herself.

"Run....they....are....comeing!" Rachel stopped walking. Then, the wind spoke with another voice.

"Esmassma bes ont savcela casemesa Kumakatokhae!" It said in another tongue.

"Run!" Rachel shouted out, bursting into a sprint. Elvy, not understanding what was happening, raced after her.

"Wait!" He called out. Rachel ignored him, too terrified to stop. Maybe she was going mad, she didn't care, she heard what she heard, and for those few moments, everything was blocked out. All she knew was that she had to get away. Elvy was gaining on her, still in an confused state. Glancing back, Rachel saw a massive black cloud approaching them.

"Stanios!!" The wind voices called out. Her blood froze. Each and every possible hair on her back raised. She stumbled. She fell.

* * *

Dran woke up early, just in time for the sunrise he loved watching. He sat cross-leged, and watch it rise above the stanio village. it was still dark. When at last the sun poked out it's head, he saw no village. He saw black remains what may have been houses. He gasped.

"Rachel! Elvy!" He called out, racing off to the tent. He saw the tent flap open, fluttering in the wind.

"Oh no," Dran muttered. He turned to the hills. There was no way they could've gotten over the hills in one night. Now way if they were alone. Dran pondered his choices. Or he could set off after them, and cross the hills, not knowing who or what he was following, or he could go back to the village, find out what he was after, then decide whether or not to follow. But then, if he did follow, he would be at least two days behind them. To him the choice was obvious. quickly, he grabbed his bag, loaded it with a few light things, two leather water bottles, and a few apples. He left the tents, and set out across the hills.

* * *

"Esmassma! Finally, where is our king?" One shadow asked. The fleshless man looked up.

"Where are the rest of you" The fleshless man asked.

"What do you mean?" A voice came from the shadowy cloud.

"Only half of you are here...Where are the rest?"

"Two Stanios, they escaped. We sent them after them. Now, Esmassma, where is our master?" The voice spoke.

"Dead," He replied. This sent scours of laugh-like sounds from the massive cloud of black shadows. They stood on black ground. With hairline cracks, that went so deep, you could see magma.

"Oh, really Esmassma!" The shadow turned.

"You call me out of my throne, you laugh at me, and interrogate me," Not a sound was to be heard now. "and now, you call me by my name. Esmassma is not to used by any but me!" A shadow seemed to come across the dark land.

"Now...you better listen to me. I DON'T NEED YOU!! I could let you all desintergrate right now, right here,"

"Sure," Esmassma stared at the shadow that had spoken.

"How much would you be willing to bet on that?" He asked emotionless.

"I would bet all these lives here you can't even defeat me in battle!"

"Then come forth. We shall fight," Esmassma replied. BaCelik grinned. The shadow emerged from the crowd, holding a javelin with a three pronged tip. Esmassma took a long serrated blade out of BaCelik's hand. Everyone stepped back. The shadow circled Esmassma. he stood still. Suddenly, the shadow launshed itself forward. He never reached Esmassma. He was blown away by the small breeze, his shadowy substance disentergrating. Esmassma hadn't moved. The great cloud of shadow's gasped. Esmassma gave the sword back to the still grinning BaCelik. Esmassma walked away. Then, a watery image of BaCelik formed above him. The shadows knew what was happening. He was BaCelik, his body couldn't hold his watery spirt. He was now to leaft his body annuly. Each time, only for one week.

"It sssssssseamssssss you have a new masssster." The spirt said.

Chapter VI: topic38872.html

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User avatar
Linx
Review
Linx wrote a review · Tue Nov 18, 2008 2:28 am

I'm back! :D
Now lets get started!

"What?" Elvy asked.
"You can't know that....how could you know?" You can change the period after asked to a comma, then move this line up. It will help.


"Ummm....I think we should take you to doctor Gulio."

Capitalize Doctor.
"I'm not going mad! I heard it! listen now." Change the period to a comma. Capitalize Listen. Rachel said. For several moments they were quite. I think you mean quiet. The wind didn't speak.
"The wind spoke?" Elvy asked, starting waling again. Huh? I got lost a bit there. First off, wailing is spelled wailling. Second, who is wailing?



"Good," The voice from the corner said. "Bring them here," Change the comma to a period."My lord, they want you to go to them yourself putting a comma here wouldn't hurt my liege." Change the period to a comma BaCelik said.


"Yes," The vioce came. First off, I think you meant voice. Second, came doesn't work that well. How about spoke?


to terrified to stop. Change the to to too


She stumbled. She fell. Combining the two sentences here will help.


That is all I can find. :D Good job, Reuben. Except for a few grammar mistakes, this thing is becoming good! :D PM me if you want to ask anything and if you post anything soon!



Be steadfast as a tower that doth not bend its stately summit to the tempest’s shock.
— Dante Alighieri